How to stay calm when you know you'll be stressed | Daniel Levitin

Stress symptoms: Effects on your body and behavior

Stress symptoms may be affecting your health, even though you might not realize it. You may think illness is to blame for that nagging headache, your frequent insomnia or your decreased productivity at work. But stress may actually be the culprit.

Common effects of stress

Indeed, stress symptoms can affect your body, your thoughts and feelings, and your behavior. Being able to recognize common stress symptoms can give you a jump on managing them. Stress that's left unchecked can contribute to many health problems, such as high blood pressure, heart disease, obesity and diabetes.

Common effects of stress on your body

• Headache
• Muscle tension or pain
• Chest pain
• Fatigue
• Change in sex drive
• Stomach upset
• Sleep problems

Common effects of stress on your mood

• Anxiety
• Restlessness
• Lack of motivation or focus
• Feeling overwhelmed
• Irritability or anger
• Sadness or depression

Common effects of stress on your behavior

• Overeating or undereating
• Angry outbursts
• Drug or alcohol abuse
• Tobacco use
• Social withdrawal
• Exercising less often

Source

How stress affects your body - Sharon Horesh Bergquist

Anger Management Techniques

How to Deal with Stress

Stress causes physical changes in the body designed to help you take on threats or difficulties.

You may notice that your heart pounds, your breathing quickens, your muscles tense and you start to sweat.

This is sometimes known as the 'fight or flight' response.

Once the threat or difficulty passes, these physical effects usually fade. But if you're constantly stressed, your body stays in a state of high alert and you may develop stress-related symptoms.

Symptoms of stress

Stress can affect how you feel emotionally, mentally and physically, and also how you behave.

How you may feel emotionally

• overwhelmed
• irritable and 'wound up'
• anxious or fearful
• lacking in self esteem

How you may feel mentally

• racing thoughts
• constant worrying
• difficulty concentrating 
• difficulty making decisions

How you may feel physically

• headaches
• muscle tension or pain
• dizziness
• sleep problems
• feeling tired all the time 
• eating too much or too little

How you may behave

• drinking or smoking more
• snapping at people
• avoiding things or people you are having problems with

Visit the Mind website for more signs of stress.

How to tackle stress

You can't always prevent stress, but there are lots of things you can do to manage stress better. You could:

• try these 10 simple stress busters
• use these easy time-management techniques
• try mindfulness – studies have found that mindfulness can help to reduce stress and improve your mood
• use calming breathing exercises
• download some relaxation and mindfulness apps onto your phone
• listen to an anxiety control audio guide

Other things that may help:

• share your problems with family or friends
• make more time for your interests and hobbies
• take a break or holiday
• take some regular exercise and make sure you are eating healthily
• make sure you are getting enough sleep (see tips on better sleep)

Read how 'workaholic' Arvind learned to deal with stress.

What causes stress?

Big life changes often create stress, even happy events like having a baby or planning a wedding.

Feeling that you aren't in control of events in your life – for example, if you are diagnosed with a serious illness or you get made redundant – can also cause stress.

Stress may be related to:

• work – for example, unemployment, a high workload or retirement (see Beat stress at work)
• family – for example, divorce, relationship difficulties or being a carer
• housing – for example, moving house or problems with neighbours
• personal issues – for example, coping with a serious illness, bereavement or financial problems

It's important to tackle the causes of stress in your life if you can. Avoiding problems rather than facing them can make things worse.

However, it's not always possible to change a stressful situation. You may need to accept there's nothing you can do about it and refocus your energies elsewhere. For example, if you're a carer, find ways to take breaks and do the things you enjoy.

When to see your GP about stress

If you've tried self-help techniques and they aren't working, see your GP. There are lots of other options open to you, such as guided self-help or cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT).

You may be able to attend a stress management course. Ask your GP or self-refer to your local psychological therapies (IAPT) services.

Source

The Seven Most Important Anger Questions to Ask Yourself

Why are angry women so threatening to others? And to our own selves?

If we are guilty, depressed, or self-doubting, we stay in place. We do not take action except against our own selves and we are unlikely to be agents of personal and social change.

In contrast, angry women may change and challenge the lives of us all, as witnessed by the past decades of feminism. And change is an anxiety-arousing and difficult business for everyone, including those of us who are actively pushing for it.

Thus, we too learn to fear our own anger, not only because it brings about the disapproval of others, but also because it signals the necessity for change.

We may begin to ask ourselves questions that serve to block or invalidate our own experience of anger: “Is my anger legitimate?” “Do I have a right to be angry?” “What’s the use of my getting angry?” “What good will it do?”.

These questions can be excellent ways of silencing ourselves and shutting off our anger.

Let us question these questions. Anger is neither legitimate nor illegitimate, meaningful nor pointless. Anger simply is.

To ask, “Is my anger legitimate?” is similar to asking, “Do I have a right to be thirsty? After all, I just had a glass of water fifteen minutes ago. Surely my thirst is not legitimate. And besides, what’s the point of getting thirsty when I can’t get anything to drink now, anyway?”

Anger is something we feel. It exists for a reason and always deserves our respect and attention. We all have a right to everything we feel—and certainly our anger is no exception.

But If feeling anger signals a problem, venting anger does not solve it. So there arequestions about anger that may be helpful to ask ourselves:

       “What am I really angry about?”

       “What is the problem, and whose problem is it?”

        “How can I sort out who is responsible for what?”

       “How can I learn to express my anger in a way that will not leave me feeling helpless and powerless?”

       “When I’m angry, how can I clearly communicate my position without becoming defensive or attacking?”

       “What risks and losses might I face if I become clearer and more assertive?” 

        “If getting angry is not working for me, what can I do differently?”

These are the questions I address in The Dance of Anger,  not with the goal of getting rid of our anger or doubting its validity, but of gaining greater clarity about its sources and then learning to take a new and different action on our own behalf.

If what we're doing with our anger isn't working, it won't help to do more of the same.

Source

Managing Stress - Brainsmart - BBC